Life is short. I have
experienced more loss in my life then I could ever imagine. Since losing my mom, three years ago; my son,
Tommy, almost two years ago; and then our “other son”, Keegan almost a year ago
my priorities and relationships have changed dramatically. I do
not and will not waste my time with people who are rude, mean, and
hurtful. At all odds I protect myself
and my family from people like this in our life. We are fragile and will continue to be for a
long time because of what we have been through and the deep grief we feel.
Believe it or not there are a lot of selfish people in the
world that don’t care or make time for you even though they call themselves
family or friends. There are also family
and friends who can’t let go of things in the past and continue to try and hurt
you or cause drama because they have nothing better to do with their time. I don’t have time for that nor do I or anyone
else in my family deserve that. I don’t
hate those people and I would never be rude to them in return, but I will avoid
them like the plague to protect myself and my family. What I have learned is that if you allow
yourself to be around people who are toxic, full of drama, and bad influence it
will affect you negatively whether you are a part of it or not, just being
around it can cause unseen damage. We
all have enough drama, pain, and hurt in our lives we don’t need to add to it
by feeling like we have to be in relationships with individuals just because
they are family and/or a “friend”.
What is a family or friend in my book? It’s someone who is always there for you and
makes time for you because you are important to them. It’s someone who treats you the same no
matter who else they are around. It’s
someone who doesn’t judge, always listens, and loves you unconditionally. It’s someone whom you can trust and who
trusts you. It’s someone who includes
you in their lives and wants to be a part of yours. It’s someone who would drop anything at any time
to be there in a crisis and stand by your side through it all. It’s someone who will always have your back
and not allow others to speak of you negatively. It’s someone who when your around they want
to be around you just as much.
Death has changed me.
Experiencing five major losses in 5 years can do that to a person; to a
family. Our hearts have grown in
humility for those who are broken, hurting, and emotionally and mentally
struggling. Our thoughts and words have
become tenderer, thoughtful, understanding, and patient. Our eyes have become more open, honest, and
searching for the signs arounds us.
Although we are called to LOVE everyone as Jesus loved us, we also need
to guard our hearts from those whose selfish ambitions and hurtful words can
cause us or our family harm.
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